Hospital stay/ Coming home with Baby

Hey Baby!

I can not believe my little guy is already 6 months old!
I am not going to lie, these past 6 months have been the most tiring time in my life for sure.
I thought since I had so much experience being a nanny (been babysitting since I was in the 5th grade, so  almost 20 years experience working with children), this would be a breeze.
Nope!
When you have your own child, it is never ending.
However, I have never felt so fulfilled and proud of myself EVER!
I truly feel I was born to be a Mommy.
Becoming a parent is the hardest, but most rewarding job you could ever have.

Here are my personal experiences.
I hope they make you feel a little more normal and not alone during this crazy time.
Every day honestly gets easier and better as you get to know your baby, develop routines and figure out what works best for you and your family.

In the Hospital:
I was so glad to come home from the hospital...
I was in the hospital for 2 nights and got slim to no rest while I was there.
You have visitors to entertain, a new baby to learn about, and endless nurses and doctors checking on you every hour. I especially loved it when they would come in every hour and tell you how you should be resting and sleeping when the baby is...
Hello??? Then quit waking me up!!! LOL
My advice is to limit visitors and do not feel guilty sending baby to the nursery to get some much needed rest.
I knew it was time when my husband told me he didn't think he could drive us home the next day if he didn't get some sound sleep soon.
So off my baby went to the nursery while I cried myself to sleep.

Learning to breast feed can be frustrating.
Don't give up...
YOU CAN DO IT...
and it will eventually be way easier, cheaper, and healthier for you and your baby!
My lactation consultant was really not the most friendly woman, so I actually learned more from one of the  younger nurses that helped me.
Don't be afraid to ask for help from the person who you connect with more.
It becomes a  personal connection when having your chest exposed and handled by a stranger, so feel free to do what makes you comfortable.

Things I actually used and found helpful to bring to the hospital:
1.Your own shampoo/soap/lotion/ toothpaste etc... The hospital stuff sucks and dries out your skin and hair.
2. Your own pillow...it will make you more comfy and smell like home.
3. Ipod/ speakers/ kindle/chargers/camera...I listened to spa music while in labor and it made me feel much more relaxed.
4. Snacks...lots of different healthy kinds both for me and the hubby.
5. Comfy clothes...loose fitting and comfy. It will be painful to move around a lot after birth, so easy breezy is best.

Things I thought I needed but wish I hadn't brought:
1. A million outfits for baby...the hospital gives you a few long sleeve shirts and beanies. It's easier to change baby's diaper in just a shirt. Just a cute going home outfit would be enough.
2. A million blankets for baby...The hospital will swaddle baby in the standard blanky which is nice to take home as a keep sake. Maybe just one cute/extra soft one would be fine.
3. The boppy...it takes up too much room and I just used a regular pillow for the first few weeks.
4. More than one suitcase...keep things simple. The hospital will send you home with lots of stuff and you don't want to worry about lugging around a million things while putting baby in the car for the first time.
5.Breast pump/bottles... If breastfeeding your boob is enough in the beginning :)

 Welcome Home:
I had been in labor for 4 days so needless to say my husband and I were tired...very very tired.
And I brought a cold home with me as well...awesome!

Bringing a baby home from the hospital is super scary...

You just went through this exhausting trauma of birthing a baby and then are expected to be a full time caregiver!
I had severe tearing so was in quite a bit of pain...and it lasted a long time! I would say about 4 months.
I did everything to keep the area clean but still got an infection which prolonged my recovery I think.
I for sure had the Baby Blues for the first 2 weeks as well.
Your hormones are all screwed up so crying for no reason will happen a lot.
Your life changes so dramatically once you have a baby it can feel so overwhelming.
My life felt so different so fast.
Luckily my best friend had just had a baby 9 months earlier so she was my go to lady!
I love you Britt!!!
Of coarse my husband is the most caring and sweet man ever,

but you really want advice and to talk to another woman who has experienced the same thing you just went through.
We had only family visit for the first 2 weeks home.
They would bring food and help hold the baby which is a huge relief for even a few moments.
Lack of sleep, learning to breastfeed, and a crying baby can make you crazy!

Things that definitely helped us in the beginning:
1.Sleep sheep or sound machine...Clark likes the rain sound best. We have 2...one for the house and one for the car.
2. Baby carrier...We have the Ergo with infant insert which was great for when he was super little, and the Bjorn for when he was a little bigger and liked to face out. Essential for getting a few things done around the house when baby wants to be held close.
3. Gripe Water (Mothers Bliss)...great for hiccups or when you try everything else and they are still crying. Maybe they have an upset tummy and this seems to help us a lot.
4. Baby swing...Clark slept A LOT in his swing in the beginning. A huge lifesaver when you need to just set the baby down for a bit!
5. Boppy...so great for nursing!

Hang in there...

The pain will subside, sleep will come, and there will be no greater love or joy then taking care of your adorable little baby.

This could not be more true.

Good luck, from Our Family to yours :)

Clark's Birth Story 2013

It's actually happening...kinda!

Oh man was Clark's delivery a rough one. Thankfully it had a very happy ending with Mommy and baby happy and healthy, but very very tired!

Clark's anticipated date of arrival was March 4, 2013...which came and went.
I went to the midwife on my due date and cried when we heard I was not dilated or thinned out at all.
I was ready to meet my guy and was so disappointed to hear we had to wait longer.
There was not much this control freak could do to get her guy...so we waited and waited and waited.
My labor pains began 5 days later on Saturday March 9th.
I tried to speed things along by cleaning the house and staying active all day.
Saturday evening my contractions were consistent and coming 3 minutes apart so we called the midwife and headed to the hospital.

To my total dismay we were sent home. I had only dilated  to 1 and the contractions became inconsistent.
I was advised to wait till Monday to see my midwife again since I was planning to have a natural birth.
So for 2 sleepless days and nights I waited and labored at home.
I took lots of warm baths, massages from Aaron, and TRIED to stay comfortable.

Monday came and I was counting the minutes until the appointment.
I had a stress test and ultrasound to make sure baby was OK and he was just fine...just stubborn I guess.
I was still only dilated to 1 so the midwife stripped my membrane...ummm...ouchhhhhh!
I was in so much pain and hyper sensitive, and feeling so discouraged.
The midwife said I was having prodromal labor. Basically having irregular contractions that were not getting my body to open up much.
The midwife advised we go to the hospital to get a morphine induced rest to give my body a chance to relax and open up.

That was nice :)

... but only lasted 4 hours then the contractions were back and I was miserable again.

By Tuesday morning I felt like I could not handle the pain anymore.
We went back to the hospital and basically told them to throw away my birth plan and NOT send us home!

I had dilated to only 2, so we were admitted and we gave the OK for an epidural and pitocin.
We had a fabulous midwife, student, and nurse helping us during the day.
I was finally able to get some much needed rest!
They broke my water in hopes I would deliver before the shift change at 7 pm...but i didn't :(

Then the shift change happened and everything went to crap!
We were basically ignored and very rarely checked on.
I started feeling a lot of pressure and contractions again and was told I could try to push for a long time or get a "bump" in my epidural and let my body work the baby down more.
 I chose the bump and was told the nurse would be back in an hour for me to start pushing.
We didn't see the nurse again for almost 2 hours and I was starting to panic and feel like i needed to push!!!
When we finally got the nurse back the baby was coming fast and the midwife was no where to be found...seriously?!?!?

While the nurse basically held the baby inside me, the midwife finally rushed threw the doors, threw on scrubs and my son was born about 10 minutes later!

We welcomed  Clark Michael Brayer at 11:15 pm on Tuesday March 12th, 2013.
He was 8 pounds and 21 inches.
He had blue eyes and blondish hair (don't know where that came from!)
The midwife laid my sweet baby on my belly to wait for the cord to stop pulsating.
Then Daddy cut the cord about 10 minutes later

and he started nursing immediately.

We had skin to skin contact for about an hour while I was being stitched up.
I had 3rd degree tears, so needed several layers of stitches.

Once baby and I were cleaned up,
we introduced Clark to both sets of his grandparents and his Aunt Mohria.

We had to stay in the hospital for 2 nights and the second night we decided to send him to the nursery to get a few hours of sleep.

So after 4 days ( 93 hours) of labor and 8 days past my due date, we had our healthy baby boy :)

Sometimes our bodies and babies just have a plan of their own and we just have to go along for the ride. While I was disappointed I didn't get the natural birth I wanted for my baby, I knew what my body and mind needed instead.

LOVE this BOY!!!!!

XOXOXOX

Expecting Baby Clark!

Expecting Clark Michael Brayer

Due Date: March 4, 2013
We had picked baby names before I even became pregnant.
We knew if we had a girl it would be Betty Marie, but had a harder time picking a boy name.
My husband is a teacher and associates so many names with kids he has had in class so we knew we needed something not so popular.
We love old fashioned things so we came up with Clark from my favorite movie Gone With the Wind.
Clark Gable was such an amazing actor and handsome man so I immediately loved that our boy could be associated with him.
Aaron loves Superman so Clark Kent was was a great association for him.
So Clark he became.
Then we gave him Michael in the middle as my husband and my father both have that as a middle name.

 It seems like just yesterday we found out I was pregnant.

On June 29th, 2012 we found out I was pregnant. I just had that feeling, so I bought some home pregnancy tests on the way home from work and to my enjoyment (and shock) they both came out positive. 

Such a crazy feeling mixed with excitement, shock, happiness, and honestly fear.

We had only been married for about 4 months and had not even taken our honeymoon yet. I always had the feeling that it would be hard for me to conceive so I thought it would take a lot longer!

I called Aaron in from the other room and said, "Ummm, I think I'm pregnant!" we both just kind of laughed and awkwardly hugged. It took a few days for it to really sink in (and about 5 more pregnancy tests just to be sure).

5 months

We had to wait until I was 10 weeks to see the doctor so off we went on our honeymoon in July. When we came back we saw the doctor and heard the best sound in the whole world...our baby's heart beat! 

We waited anxiously while the tech located the sound, what a scary 10 minutes that was!

19 weeks

Once we found out our baby was healthy and growing we were so relieved.

We found out we were going to have a boy...just like Daddy wanted :) 

 I was a very nervous Momma to be and did everything by the book! We read weekly updates from babycenter, read several books and blogs, and decided to switch to a midwife for an all natural birth plan.

25 weeks

I gave up coffee cold turkey...ummm what a mistake! I had crippling headaches that brought me to tears from the withdraws. I never got sick, but did have major food aversions. 

My favorite food while pregnant was PB&J sandwiches!

 I  had a super easy and healthy pregnancy besides that.

27 weeks

 I stayed vegetarian all the way through until my last month and allowed myself a few indulgences for the last month. I quickly went back to vegetarian once he was born as I found it actually upset my stomach more if I ate meat.

29 weeks

We enjoyed the holidays with our family and rang in the New Year (2013) fast asleep by midnight with my baby in my belly, my husband by my side, and my doggie snuggled at my feet.

Perfection :)

I had a family baby shower at my parents house in December.

32 weeks

36 weeks

And a friends baby shower at Brittany's house in January.

I had a great pregnancy for 10 months and eventually went past my due date by 8 days.

We  finally welcomed Clark Michael Brayer on March 12, 2013!

Eco- Friendly and Low Budget Wedding and Reception

How to Go Green and save Green on your Big Day:

Reduce, Reuse, Recycle, Restore!

We try our best to live in earth friendly practices on a daily basis.

 When it came to our Wedding and Reception, it was very important to stay true to our values and beliefs.

Here are just a few ways that we were able to keep our Wedding Day and Reception Party environmentally friendly and low budget:

LOCATION: Our first big save was to host both the wedding and reception in my parents backyard. We live in Phoenix and were married in February with the reception in April so the weather was perfect. My parents have a beautifully landscaped back yard with lots of green grass,  plants, trees, and flowers. They also supplemented more flowers and plants by borrowing some from their local nursery. We bought a white arch at Hobby Lobby and added some flowers, chairs, and ribbons for decor. We kept things very simple as only a few friends and family were going to attend the actual ceremony. I also made a play list with hand picked songs on my ipod and our wireless speakers for "walking down the aisle" and borrowed large speakers for the party.

I walked down the isle to John Denver's, "Annie's Song" (which Aaron hated and we fought about and I threw a pillow at him while planning the wedding...LOL!!!).
However, our song is Ray Charles, "Come Rain or Come Shine."

DECOR: Most all of the decorations we used were hand made, up-cycled  or previously owned. We went for a vintage theme which allowed us to use lots of mine and my Mom's vintage silver trays, candelabras, lace, and doilies. 

Friends and Family also helped me to collect recycled mason and glass jars to use as candle holders and vases. I filled the jars with sand and added candlesticks, tea lights/electronic tea lights and finished them off with a hemp bow on the outside.

 We also opted to use baby's breath and hand made paper flowers (which Aaron even helped me make!) from vintage book pages and eucalyptus  instead of flower arrangements as centerpieces.

I hand made "Just Married" and "Sweet Love" banners for our car and above the desert table. I simply used vintage book pages, a sharpie, and hemp string to make the banners. I love how they turned out!

We even found a company called foreverfiances that makes plant-able 100% recycled paper invitations embedded with wildflower seeds. This company was super easy and beautiful to work with. 

FOOD & DRINKS: We used a catering company called Santa Barbera to cater all the food and supply tables, chairs, linens, staff, plates, glasses, and silverware. This was a big splurge. We stayed green by ordering lots of vegetarian and vegan dishes and opted to use all reusable cloth and ceramic dishes.

My parents neighbor was kind enough to supply almost all of the alcohol which was a huge save. The bar was one thing we did not want to compromise on so that was an enormous favor :)

We are fortunate to have such wonderful friends and family and asked several favors along the way. We had our good friend be our officiant, hired another friend to be a photographer, and borrowed DJ speakers. All of which we are extremely grateful for. I also have to mention that Aaron and I would never be able to afford half of this wedding and reception without the help of our parents :)

ATTIRE:  Aaron and I kept our attire simple and bought several pieces that we could reuse in the future.

 I got to wear my dress twice, borrowed my sisters veil, and went for simple jewelry and hand made hair flower accessories. I did my own makeup, and my mom and I did my hair. I bought a separate dress from Buffalo Exchange (a used clothing store) to wear to dinner after our ceremony. 

I also plan on selling my wedding gown to be re-used. (update: I recently sold my wedding dress to Almond Tree...a consignment wedding boutique in Phoenix. 

 We last minute decided against having a wedding party, and instead simply asked those who were supposed to be to just wear anything black and be our guests.

 Aaron bought separate black jacket and slacks, suspenders, and tie to mix and match for the ceremony and party and future uses as well.

Events: We skipped the traditional engagement party, bridal shower, bachelor parties and decided to do the ceremony sooner rather than later. We have lived together for the past several years and felt for us, it was better to just be focused on becoming husband and wife. Since we already have our home with everything we need, we decided not to do a registry and instead used money we got for a week long beach honeymoon with our dog, Bubba, in the summer (which i ended up being pregnant during...surprise!).

We kept things small, simply, elegant, and easy and were thrilled with how everything turned out.